FRANK BODY SWEET CHEEKS TRIO REVIEW

I’m back, with a review of Frank Body’s products. Specifically, the cleanser, scrub and moisturizer.

Feel free to scroll down to the review if you don’t want to read on why I’m uncomfortable supporting Frank Body as a company.

 

TELL ME WHERE YOU GET YOUR COFFEE FROM, BABE.

 The subjects of today's critique. Brought to you by Matso's Ginger Beer.

The subjects of today's critique. Brought to you by Matso's Ginger Beer.

Firstly, I’ve not tried their body scrubs, but they sure as hell can’t tell me where they source their coffee from. I messaged them on their site, and they sent me an email in response...

emailbabe

As observed*.

For a company that was quick to point out the ethical mica in their new shimmer line, it’s quite telling when they can’t say where they source their main ingredient from. And yes, ethical coffee does exist. It even exists in Australia, which is where Frank Body started.

Now, you may be wondering why I’m splitting hairs with this company – why reach out in the first place? Simply put, it’s their marketing. A cheeky example – not quite verbatim, but damn close if you follow their social media, or even check out the website:

‘THANKS, BABE. HERE, BABE. SCRUB ME ON, BABE, I KNOW YOU LIKE TO GET DIRTY.’

Honestly, it irks me when companies talk down to their customers, let alone think that every single woman wants to be called ‘babe’. It’s demeaning, and quite frankly, disgusting. You may think it’s all about good intentions, but when has marketing been about good intentions? Really, this is just a way for consumers to feel more connected to the brand, and make the brand itself seem more relatable. While I have issues with marketing (in general), I would like – for once – to see Frank Body market something without the word ‘babe’. The brand is already rather well known – wouldn’t it be best to let the products speak for themselves?

Speaking of...

 

GET ON WITH IT. TELL US ABOUT THE PRODUCTS

Cleanser

 ...Mmm. Charcoal based cleanser. Delicous. 

...Mmm. Charcoal based cleanser. Delicous. 

INGREDIENTS (directly from the website):
Water (Aqua), Sodium Lauroyl Methyl Isethionate (Natural Surfactant), Cetearyl Olivate, Cetearyl Alcohol, Glycerin, Sorbitan Olivate, Coffea Arabica Seed Extract, Prunus Amygdalus Dulcis (Sweet Almond) Oil, Vitis Vinifera (Grape) Seed Oil, Olus (Vegetable) Oil, Cocos Nucifera (Coconut) Oil, Butyrospermum Parkii (Shea) Butter, Theobroma Cacao (Cocoa) Seed Butter, Pogostemon Cablin Oil (Patchouli), Althaea Officinalis Root Extract (Marshmallow), Alcohol, Echinacea Angustifolia Extract, Tocopherol (Vitamin E), Glycine Soja (Soybean) Oil, Salicylic Acid, Chondrus Crispus (Carrageenan), Xanthan Gum (Sugar), Citric Acid (Corn), Dehydroacetic Acid, Benzyl Alcohol (Cinnamon Derived), Charcoal Powder. Total Naturally Derived: 99.80%

This is fine. Honestly, there’s nothing to write home about here. It’s almost barely worth a review. Slight charcoal scent, somewhat slippery consistency, low PH. It works for the most part if you’re not wearing heavy amounts of makeup. Doesn’t leave the skin feeling dry. Doesn’t really do anything beyond cleansing – either no makeup, or very light. It has a fairly good ingredient list, but so do a lot of other cleansers.

 Non-foamy!

Non-foamy!

 

It also doesn't foam up!

Just quickly, there’s a bit on the site about the main colour/star of this cleanser!

'ACTIVATED CHARCOAL
Deep cleans skin, removing breakout causing impurities naturally. Throw out anything in your cupboard that contains peroxide, babe.'

Michelle of Labmuffin did a piece on how this could work, which is worth a read over HERE. Theoretically it can work, but as a cleanser, and so low on the ingredient list… I’m kind of doubtful. I do like the colour, though!

RATING: 2.5 BABES

 

SCRUB

 The gritty-gritty.

The gritty-gritty.

INGREDIENTS (directly from the website):
Water (Aqua), Kaolin (White Clay), Coffea Arabica Seed Powder, Cetearyl Olivate, Bambusa Arundinacea Stem (Bamboo) Powder, Juglans Regia (Walnut) Shell Powder, Sorbitan Olivate, Sodium Lauroyl Methyl Isethionate (Natural Surfactant), Vitis Vinifera (Grape) Seed Oil, Glycerin, Prunus Amygdalus Dulcis (Sweet Almond) Oil, Honey (Mel), Olus (Vegetable) Oil, Cocos Nucifera (Coconut) Oil, Butyrospermum Parkii (Shea) Butter, Theobroma Cacao (Cocoa) Seed Butter, Tocopherol, Glycine Soja (Soybean) Oil, Rosa Canina Fruit (Rosehip) Oil, Chondrus Crispus (Carrageenan), Xanthan Gum (Sugar), Citric Acid (Corn), Benzyl Alcohol (Cinnamon Derived), Potassium Sorbate, Dehydroacetic Acid. Total Naturally Derived: 99.5%

This, again, is fine. It works well to exfoliate – it will leave redness if you go too heavy handed, however. It’s a tough scrub, with a good consistency for a physical exfoliant. Smells like coffee, which I love. It doesn’t…seem to do much more than just scrub, and if you already have somewhat dry skin, it will leave the skin feeling somewhat tight after use. I mean, it’s nice, but it’s not exactly the world’s best face scrub.

 Such a sensual texture.

Such a sensual texture.

I will (begrudgingly) say this: it’s good. It’s affordable for what it is, and a little goes a long way. Great for pre-shaving as well, as my partner used it, and he doesn’t like anything Frank Body related (again, the whole babe thing). So, for those of us in Australia, with access to Priceline, Mecca, etc – in terms of what’s available (Mecca in particular) – go for this.

RATING: 4 BABES!

 

MOISTURIZER

 Moist...urizer.

Moist...urizer.

INGREDIENTS (directly from the website):
Water (Aqua), Squalane (Olive), Vitis Vinifera (Grape) Seed Oil, Glycerin, Cetearyl Olivate, Caprylic/Capric Triglyceride, Prunus Amygdalus Dulcis (Sweet Almond) Oil, Sorbitan Olivate, Olus (Vegetable) Oil, Coffea Arabica (Coffee) Seed Oil, Vitis Vinifera (Grape) Fruit Extract, Cocos Nucifera (Coconut) Oil, Butyrospermum Parkii (Shea Butter), Theobroma Cacao (Cocoa) Seed Butter, Tocopherol (Vitamin E), Glycine, Soja (Soybean) Oil, Aloe Barbadensis (Aloe Vera) Leaf Juice, Glycyrrhiza Glabra (Licorice) Root Extract, Fragrance (Parfum), Chondrus Crispus (Carrageenan), Xanthan Gum (Sugar), Citric Acid (Corn), Potassium Sorbate, Benzyl Alcohol (Cinnamon Derived), Dehydroacetic Acid, Sodium Citrate (Corn). Total Naturally Derived: 99.92%

And a cheeky description from the website: 'Natural, lightweight and caffeinated. I'm the perfect moisturiser, if I do say so myself. I don't contain any nasties that secretly clog pores over time. I only contain ingredients that make your skin look great and stay healthy.'

 Rub, rub, rub.

Rub, rub, rub.

I would consider this product the weakest of the three. It has a thicker consistency, slight coffee-scent, and does its best to not be irritating on the skin. If you’ve wrecked your skin barrier because of skin irritants and general fuckery, this product will be somewhat soothing for approximately two seconds before it feels like burning. So, I wouldn’t say this is recommended for sensitive skin types. It also led to little clusters of breakouts, no matter when, or what combination of products were used. I would disagree with the website sayingI’m not greasy, just dewy - so I work well under or over makeup. Try it. ‘ I found it to be the opposite. It felt like it sat on the surface of my skin, no matter how much I tried to rub it in…circular motions, as the site said.

RATING: 1 BABE, SORRY!

 

TL;DR

PACKAGING: Tubular, man. The scrub will accumulate water in the lid if you leave it in the shower.
PRICE: $49.95AUD for all three (only online). Scrub: $21.95AUD, cleanser: $21.95AUD, moisturizer: $21.95AUD.
RESULTS: Minimal, or in the description. Scrub can scrub, cleanser does cleanse, and moisturizer…well, not great. There’s really nothing to say about any of it.
AVAILABILITY: https://www.frankbody.com/au/store-locator/ In Australia, it’s exclusive to Mecca Maxima
WORTH (RE)PURCHASING?: Look, if you’re in the market to get into skincare, and you’ve got fairly straightforward face parts – normal, I suppose – this is a great starter kit, so to speak.

 

*I was going to talk about the 30 Day Clear Skin Challenge, but it was somewhat problematic, and quite frankly, just didn’t work for me. Obviously.